July 26, 2005

Now Poms, take this!

A few weeks ago, the English media and Aussie media were ripping Ponting's men literally. Now, it's payback time. (English media:"You bunch of drips" - The Daily Mirror ,  "Vaughan again losers"  - The Sun, "New era but the same white flag" - Nasser Hussain in The Daily Mail. Already, emails are being circulated tormenting the "Poms" (English) cricketers!

Here's a sample!


 Q. How dominant is Australia's No. 1 fastbowler?
 A. Well, most people in England think their opening batsman's real name
    is Trescothick B McGrath
.
 
 Q. What is England's best chance of a win in the second test at Edgbaston?
 A. Telling the Aussies the match is at the Oval.
 
 Q. Heard about the new Ashes trophy?
 A. Yes, if England lose another series they're going to keep the bails
    and burn the players instead
.
 
 Q. How bad is the English batting?
 A. Well, the selectors are thinking of moving Extras up the batting
    order.
 
 Q. Why are the England players demanding increased match payments?
 A. Someone has let on that Ashes Tests sometimes go to a fourth day.
 
 Q. What is the height of optimism?
 A. An English batsman applying sunscreen.
 
  Q. What would Glen McGrath be if he was an Englishman?
 A. An allrounder.
 
 Q. What is the English version of a hat-trick?
 A. Three runs in three balls.
 
 Q. What do you call an Englishman with 100 runs against his names?
 A. A bowler.
 
 Q. What was the most proficient form of footwork displayed by English
    batsmen?
 A. The walk back to the pavilion.
 
 Q. Who has the easiest job in the English team?
 A. The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats
 

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